Posts Tagged ‘distinguish’

Whether self-employed, employed by organizations, whether retired or unemployed, we all engage with companies and organizations that support us or we support them. In our interactions with these organizations, what we are wanting is to experience qualities of dignity, first and foremost. This means being treated as a sovereign individual of value, worthy of respect. I want people to communicate authentically, with curiosity and interest.

Disheartened by too many disappointments with customer service representative, HR people and bosses who have an agenda above and beyond the notion treating us as human beings, we’ve come to choose to cloak ourselves in various armor-styles. Through this strategy we attempt to mitigate the experience of being disempowered, triggered by attitudes and environments that are less than safe.

Consequences of stressful conversations and working environment are such that each of us actually empower ourselves to choose ways of being that are disempowering. We choose to lower our heads, withdraw and withhold, generating far less creativity, innovation, engaged sharing, often precipitating depression and demoralizing environments.

We are all affected by our own unique ways of empowering ourselves to disempower ourselves. That sounds confusing but it is none-the-less accurate. We want to blame others and remain unconscious as to how we are creating our own demise.

D.E.N.I.A.L (Don’t Even kNow I Am Lying) is the word that comes to mind.

Certainly we are affected by other people’s attitudes, moods and actions. At the same time, it’s important to get that they are also very much affected by our own. Our tendency is to want others to change so we can feel safe enough to the change too.

Quite often people are angered by my suggesting that we are not victims to our circumstance, that somehow we are collaborators and colluding with the enemy, that we are responsible for the abuse that is perpetrated upon us. My job is to provide an environment, in this case through my writing, where people can feel safe enough to being exploring possibilities beyond this current paradigm, which doesn’t allow deeper examination of the role we play within abusive environments.

Distinguishing what it is you are committed to will facilitate a conversation that either generates a discovering process or a disempowering process. This is in alignment with our previous discussion regarding commitments and conflicting or underlying commitment. Disclosing both reveals patterns and processes that we are unlikely aware of, yet present powerful and devastating outcomes.

D is for Dilemma

I spoke about this in my previous blog, that we are wanting change in our work environment and at the same time we are fearful of the consequence for being the change you are wanting. This creates a dilemma and precipitates a critical choice-point in just about every arena of our lives not just in the workplace. Again, getting clear about what you want and the degree to which you are committed to what you want can mean you begin to detach yourself from the perspectives and interpretations by which you have been living, being and acting. Through detachment you create a more expanded capacity to witness yourself making choices that aren’t in alignment with your own commitment. You begin to distinguish your actions from your thoughts, and intently choose to choose in alignment with what you are wanting.

Detach from Fear

At the New Living Expo, where I spoke about spiritual wounding in the workplace, there were many individuals present who experienced such disappointment, depression, dejection through their workplace. As we spoke it became clear that they needed to become their own advocate; not just in standing up for themselves but by noticing how they may be contributing to their workplace being less than optimal.

One woman asked – “What are some things I can practice before going into a meeting where I feel less than?” I encouraged her to sit quietly and get clear with her intentions – what it is she really wanted from the conversation, and then to feel the quality of that experience in her body of having it already. In this way she can truly embody her intention, and when embodied she’d be more than likely to follow through. Otherwise, the anxiety and fear precipitated by her conflicting commitment would take over and she would lose her nerve and withdraw.

A second person shared that he had used this particular practice and had experienced positive results. He shared that he’d followed through because he was able to stay in alignment with his intention by staying in this embodied experience.

Again, we have to be willing to detach from thoughts that precipitate sensations of anxiety and other discomforts. Habitually we act from these body sensations, hence it’s important to distinguish when we are acting from them and when we are acting from our intention. We know it in our bodies.

Domain of Humanity

I want to be clear with you that we choose to choose what we choose based on the ground of being we stand upon; the precepts of which are either fear-based or essence-based. These precepts reside in the Domain of Humanity.

Utilizing our personal power, we choose from fear or from non-fear. Our current paradigm is fraught with fear-based realities that we presume to be true. Can we detach ourselves from these fear-based thoughts enough to allow possibility to reveal itself? Can we allowing ourselves to expand our comfort zone to include what has yet to be conceived as real in our own thinking?

A fundamental practice that empowers this exploration is to distinguish the roots of your choice-making, within the Domain of Humanity. Just through noticing what is occurring in your body – those sometime very subtle tensions or releasing, you can reveal to yourself whether the current choice is founded on fear or founded on essential wisdom. Only through practice will you be able to reveal fascinating choice-making processes that empower you, in the long run, to self-generate dignity. Enjoy the exploration!

The power of Noticing

by Himanshu Jhamb on November 23, 2009

DistinctionsEver take a moment to notice how you notice? The intention of this post is to just do that – enable you to notice how you notice. In the fast paced world that we live in nowadays, with our daily schedules full of appointments and what-not, it is hard to take a moment to reflect upon how all action really starts in us. Humans are hard wired – yes, biologically, we are hard wired to be a certain way whereby certain things exist as mechanistic behaviors  (if you disagree, take notice of the next time you burp or have a bout of hiccups) and its hard to do anything about any of it, until we step aside and notice it, objectively. It all begins with noticing things – our surroundings, our behaviors… everything!

The next question that begs some attention then is: So, how do we notice? OR even better… how do we get better at noticing? The answer is in one simple word: Distinctions. The dictionary meaning of Distinction is “Something that Distinguishes”. With distinctions, humans learn to take notice and when we take notice, the things that seem to be happening in our background (i.e. where we don’t have much control on our actions) start happening in our foreground (i.e. we notice them). This applies to any field. Take, for example, playing soccer. Until one distinguishes (or learns the distinction) what is meant by “Off-Side” one does not know one way from the other and cannot take effective action in this domain.

The same holds for the field of Business. Until one distinguishes what “Business” means, one cannot effectively act in the domain of business. That is why people invest huge sums of money to get their MBA degrees, Project Management Certifications or Accounting diplomas and degrees… so that they can learn the distinctions that help them take effective action.

In whatever aspect of business you specialize in, commit to learning the relevant distinctions and you’ll start noticing the power of noticing.