Posts Tagged ‘job’

Mei-Li has a Ph.D. and works for one of the biggest communication companies in the world. Originally from China, she has been in Silicon Valley, California for the majority of her adult life. Married with two children Mei-Li is very happy. However, she has been facing a very challenging dilemma for many years: Though she is happy, successful and fulfilled in her life as it is, she’s concerned that she should do more – be more.

Mei-Li observes her boss focusing most of his attention on getting ahead; she sees other women at her level of management working for the next promotion, the next level of leadership and responsibility. “I don’t want an increase in responsibility; I don’t want to work that hard; I don’t like talking with people that much that I want to move to the next level of management. But, should I want to? Is there something wrong with me that I don’t want to do that? I’m afraid there’s something very wrong with me.”

As Mei-Li shares with me over many coaching sessions, her consistency of feelings and truths about what’s true for her has me coach her to see the dilemma she is currently constrained by. On the one hand, Mei-Li loves her job and the team she manages. She has the free time she needs to be available to her children and to her husband in a way that fits best with her sense of the quality relationship she wants. She isn’t stressed and unnerved by unmet deadlines. She’s actually one of the 10% of the workforce that actually is fulfilled in her career.

On the other hand, Mei-Li’s culture married with our Western culture attempts to move people into work that isn’t their’s to do. Mei-Li watches people spend more time being people pleasers than effective employees of this company and she finds this frustrating and confusing. “People aren’t getting their work done while they are schmoosing for a promotion. Should I be doing that? The fact is, I don’t like schmoosing; I don’t like going to cocktail parties, playing golf or any of those other social things that you are supposed to do if you want to get ahead. I’m a pretty reclusive person who enjoys my life the way it is. But, I feel like I should be doing more.”

Many of us face this dilemma of being more – doing more; at the same time actually finding fulfillment in what we are doing right now. But, aren’t we supposed to want more money and power? Aren’t we supposed to want the bigger office, more contact with the more influential people of the world? Aren’t we supposed to want more?

My sense is, and I shared this with Mei-Li in our session, that what people want is to get to a place where there is fulfillment in their work and personal life – that there is balance with health and happiness. I believe that most people want what Mei-Li has. She already has it. Though the current within the corporate structure drags many people in its undertow toward some fantasy life that is wrought with a lot of what they don’t want to do and perhaps aren’t really cut out to be with, there are few who willingly choose health and fulfillment with what they have, what they do and how they be.

Mei-Li laughs as she begins to see a bigger picture – one that allows her free choice to choose for herself what’s hers to do. She laughs to hear that what people are struggling for is what she already has. She laughs as she realizes that she is presently free to choose to be happy in the life she has created and if in the future she feels inspired to grow her career toward greater degrees of leadership and responsibility, she can do that.

Mei-Li isn’t out of the current, and as long as she is in the corporate environment there will always be that field of influence. The degree to which she can stay aligned with her commitment to well-being and fulfillment in her career, the stronger her dedication and the less pull this will have on her.

Christopher, who I spoke of a few weeks ago, shared with me that if he could do anything he would work with inner city kids, teaching them math and computer skills. Then, the litany of “Why I Can’t Leave My Job and Give Up Everything I Worked For” began. There was no stopping him; the who would pay the mortgage, who would take care of my parents, I’d have to give up my addiction to Siamese cats; on and on, fully engaged in the undertow of a make believe reality, for too many, is actually real.

Mei-Li has found an eddy for now where she is out of the stream of influence by others. She is finding herself – the one she believes she has to continually pursue. It takes strength and courage to step out of the normal way of being for the sake of what we are all striving for – well-being and fulfillment in our careers. Kind of crazy when you think about it! Perhaps the pursuit of Mei-Li has come to a happy ending; right here where she has been, but now enjoying it to a much larger degree!

Can a business create profitability based on kindness? Sure, why not?

The Dali Lama says if nothing else practice kindness. This must be a very powerful practice, so just what does it entail?

I googled the word kindness and here are a few words that showed up as synonyms: Accommodation, benevolence, compassion, courtesy, forgivingness, friendliness, generosity, gentleness, goodness, goodwill, grace, graciousness, helpfulness, humanity, perceptiveness, sensibility, sensitivity, service, tolerance, understanding and warmth. Who wouldn’t want to be part of an organization that practiced kindness? As I read each one of these words I could feel a heartfulness present: a quality of being mindful of the wholeness of the organization and all of its members. Each organization has a heart, just as each individual has heart. We forget this fact. We forget our own heart too. An act of kindness reminds us to be mindful of the essential nature of life that beats within us all.

In my google search, the words that came up as antonyms for kindness were: complaisance, compliance, deference, obligingness. These words reflected a different quality – not one that generates heartfulness. To me they reflect a stand for doing the minimum of what’s required by the organization. They reflect an attitude of resistance to participate or engage. “I’m not committed enough to shift my stand or position. I don’t want to and you can’t make me.” What is underlying this stand for complaisance and compliance?

Every one of us in a business environment are there for personal gain first and foremost. Only as a secondary intention are we there to fulfill the vision and mission of the organization itself.  If it were any other way we would set aside our judgments and interpretations, our fears and needs, our resistance and other survival strategies for the best interest of everyone associated with this organization. We would act in alignment with the highest good and the highest truth of ourselves, which is always in the alignment with the highest good of everyone and, believe it or not, every organization. The fact is that we just aren’t that committed.

Though we say we are committed to serving our organization, generally we aren’t committed enough to shift our personal perspective in order to move beyond compliance and complaisance. What are we committed to?

I suspect many of us have a hit list – those people at work who we wish would disappear, with whom we avoid eye contact and conversation. It may be those about whom we gossip or complain. We may even perform passive-aggressive or passive-resistant maneuvers in order to sabotage their success or fulfillment. I’m always curious about what we gain from other people’s demise.

Taking on a practice of kindness, just as a practice, will reveal underlying motives. Bubbles of emotions begin to surface that often feel uncomfortable. It’s not uncommon for anger, frustration and sadness to arise. Attached to each of these emotions is a thought that is harbored in the recesses of your mind; a belief, a judgment or interpretation that is confronted by just the smallest act of kindness. I’m always fascinated by this process, and though it is often uncomfortable I encourage the exploration, discovering what’s interfering with kindness, compassion, generosity, graciousness. What do you have to lose? Funny, isn’t it, that we think we have something to lose by being kind.

Kindness makes good economic sense. Research shows that good business and profitability comes down to creating good relationships. Good relationships require so many of the words that relate to and include kindness. How are you doing kindness or how are you being kindness. Too often doing kindness is a transparent, inauthentic manipulation, and personal gain is its motive.

Authentic kindness – what’s the motive?

My work is grounded in authentic, engaged connection. When I am grounded in this I enjoy being myself and quite often find more to enjoy in the other. I suspend judgment about who they are, their status, what I can gain from the relationship and remain in the moment authentically engaged and connected.

Kindness, like compassion, is sometimes really challenging to practice, however when doing so we can make a huge difference in our own capacity to be relaxed, open, free of stress and pressures. It contributes to our level of happiness and enjoyment. There is nothing to lose and everything to gain by just being kind. It’s funny how it works that way.

If your company is hiring Gen-Ys (aka Millennials) fresh out of college, you will be eager to get them folded into your operation and feeling part of the team.  But you will need to handle this cohort of youngsters differently than any other generations entering the Western workforce.  At first glance, you might ask “So what is different?  After all, Gen-Ys are doing the same thing other generations have done before them: Leaving college friends and lovers, settling into new job and meeting new people.”  And that is true and the typical corporate socialization techniques designed to ease the transition of new employees from college to work – – –  social mixers, assignment of mentors, integrated product teams, etc. – – – will also be useful for incorporating Gen-Ys into your organization… OR one could get really creative with ideas such as these, to bridge this gap.

But it will not be enough because there are other, much more complex dynamics at work in the recently-employed Gen Y community.   We know this because we teach courses in Project Management and we have had some eye-popping, private conversations with Gen Y attendees about their job environment, their stress levels, their egos, expectations and fears.

Gen-Ys have an additional layer of issues affecting their mindsets and, hence, their job performance.  More than any previous generation, Gen-Ys:

  • Have grown up with iPods and near-constant music.  This is the first 100% iPod ™ generation and music has been a near-constant companion for them while driving, walking, jogging and even while studying or working.
  • Are accustomed to very frequent social contact with friends via texting, IM and Skype.  Boomers snicker at the typical Gen-Y texting with friends every few minutes and are amazed when they first see Gen-Ys on their phones while watching movies and sporting events.   Tweeting their remote friends about the movie or ballgame, and even Tweeting with friends right there in the crowd with them, is commonplace for Gen Ys.
  • Believe in a “flat” equalitarian culture, where levels of organization do not exist.  As a freshman in college a Gen Y could email (or call or visit) the President of the university, on almost any subject, and the President would discuss the subject, and thank the student for being straightforward and for bringing the problem to light.  “Chain of Command” is usually an alien concept to any Gen Ys who are at their first jobs and who lack military experience.
  • Have developed comparatively fragile egos and rely on frequent feedback on how they are doing in each class and with their friendships.

So the next time a Gen Y, new to your workplace, behaves strangely or does something you as a Gen-X or Baby Boomer might consider odd put yourself in their shoes:

  • The comfortable, predictable college world they have known for 4+ years is completely gone.  Professors with whom they could negotiate grades and arrange for “extra credit” work when needed have been replaced by a boss who is part of an entirely different culture, and embedded in a more rigid hierarchy of departments/divisions run by anonymous bureaucrats.
  • The social fabric that held their lives together is missing.  The face-to-face contact with college friends and professors is gone; only a poor electronic substitute is now available to them remotely through texts, Facebook, Twitter and cell phone calls.
  • A music-rich college world has been replaced at work by endless meetings, discussions and conference calls.  Colleagues and bosses constantly pop by the cubicle for chats, causing the iPod ™ ear buds to be constantly popping in and out as well.
  • They are functioning in this new world very much “in the blind”, without the comfort of frequent homework assignment and class quizzes to confirm their understanding of a subject and their comparative standing among peers.  Now there is no paper graded “B” to show the Gen-Y where they can improve performance.  In a new job, just when they desperately seek feedback, they get little or none from their bosses until a scheduled performance review occurs (once or twice a year, quarterly if they are lucky).

There are some simple things we can do to fix this disconnect between realities of the workplace and the expectations of our Gen Y colleagues.

In the next post we’ll learn what bosses, and Gen-y workers themselves, can do to ease the college-to-work transition.   And we’ll recommend a new frame of mind for Gen-X and Boomers to help fold-in the Gen-Ys who, if the rest of us are ever going to retire, must take their place in the workforce.

Copyright: Solid Thinking Corporation

Last week I showed you how to be a pro and likeable when pushing for change and I showed you key actions that would get you taken seriously.  Here are the other two must-do’s if you want to make things happen at the office.

  1. Be (Somewhat) Patient: Every organization, even the smallest and most agile, has a pace at which they accept change.  You just got there and, even if you don’t want to hear it, you have a lot to learn.  As you work and grow (and we are talking a few months here, not years), you’ll learn the lingo of the job, become aware of nonobvious networks of people who can help you, and begin to think like your more experienced colleagues who have been at the job longer.  While new people can bring fresh ideas, and you should share with your boss any that occur to you, there really is no substitute for experience.  Just remember that too much experience can breed arrogance and arrogance can kill.  The captain of the doomed cruise liner Titanic had 19 previous high speed crossings of the Atlantic under his belt.  This amazing track record may have lulled him into a sense of invulnerability, of thinking that droning slowly through the ice fields was for wussies.  To set a speed record, he roared on and killed a LOT of people that night in the dark, icy waters of the North Atlantic.  [Note: If you run into an idiot like that guy, I retract what I just told you – – –  show him no patience and call his boss about his arrogance, pronto!]
  2. Promote: In a calm, non-threatening, relaxed voice, tell people about the benefits of your idea.  Talk about the benefits much more than the idea itself.  The same change-phobic people who resist new ideas seem to have a harder time resisting new benefits.   Look for co-conspirators who get excited when they hear about your idea.  And when you find them, and here is the hard part, let go of the idea.  Let it become their idea too because people will advocate their “own” idea a hundred times more passionately than they will someone else’s idea.  With enough persistence you or they may even locate a senior thought leader in your organization who will become the CHAMPION for your idea.  And that would probably cinch it!

So enough waiting!  Remember last week I gave you a (hopefully hypothetical) scenario in which nobody else seems to share your sense of urgency about making a no-brainer change at the office.  We asked you to decide which of four possible courses of action would be best (push like Hell, let your boss handle it, change jobs or push gently). What course of action did you choose?

– If you chose answer “a” you are wrong.  As a new person, making this one idea your all-consuming mission in life, before you even understand the job or the work environment, will make you look foolish.  And it will absolutely damage your career.  – If you chose answer b”” you were also wrong.  The idea is not necessarily unworkable or undesirable just because your boss won’t embrace it.  Maybe he is an idiot.  Don’t just toss the idea to the boss and then abandon it if he won’t push it.

–  Did you choose c””?  Really?  Change jobs?  C’mon, get real.  The people in your group hardly know you and they have their own ongoing day-to-day crises to wrestle with.  Everybody does.  You are in more of a rush than that Titanic driver and you saw what happened to him!

–  If you chose answer d, you are incredibly astute and intelligent far beyond your years!

Just remember to also add the Four P’s to your bag of tricks for getting ideas implemented and you will be unstoppable.  Some might say “unsinkable”.

If your boss quit, died or otherwise left the job tomorrow, who would replace him/her?  You can bet that your boss’s boss thinks about that.  It is called continuity planning or succession planning and the bigger the organization, the more important it is.  The leadership wants to be sure the enterprise marches on when a key person leaves, gets sick or dies.  And the way to ensure that is to plan well in advance for smooth transitions.

What does this have to do with you, you ask?  You are not slated to move up into a more senior position in your organization anytime soon?  Don’t be too sure.  It could happen tomorrow, without warning.

I was a very junior manager at a major defense company when a mid-level manager suddenly died of a heart attack while on vacation in the Caribbean.  Instead of promoting one of the 15 people in his organization to fill the job, my boss’s boss’s boss picked me.  Without warning he called me and my boss into his office the week after the death and asked me if I wanted the job.  I told him I was honored to be considered for the job but that I already had a great job working elsewhere in his organization and would like to stay there.  He said to think about it and to let him know my decision in the next few days.

On the way back to our work area my boss said “What changes are you going to make in the organization?” to which I replied “I am not sure I am going to take the job.”  He immediately stopped walking and looked at me, genuinely puzzled, and said “You must have been in a different meeting than the one I just attended.  You were just assigned that job.”  I protested that “Wally said I could think about it let him know . . .” and my boss cut me off saying “About 3 minutes ago, you became the new manager of that organization.”  And so I had.

Often it won’t happen to you this way.  Instead, you’ll move up from within your organization, replacing your boss who leaves the organization for one reason or another.  And here is where seeking a broader perspective on things can stack the deck in your favor.   Here are some tips on getting ready and getting selected for your boss’s job:

  1. Anytime your boss talks about his/her concerns, challenges or problems, listen and offer support.  If that means helping with one of his projects, in addition to your own work, do it.  And don’t brag to others about such involvement . . . in fact don’t discuss it with anyone not directly involved in the boss’s project.  If the boss wants that info released, he will release it.
  2. Anytime your boss or her peers talk about the larger organization’s position, posture, reputation, liabilities, etc. listen and learn.  Try to get “in sync” with the leadership of your organization and learn to see the bigger picture they must deal with.
  3. Be humble but be ready.  Opportunities come at unpredictable times.  When asked if you are ready for more responsibility, if you believe that you a) are ready now or b) are almost ready, respond that you are always learning but that, yes, you are ready for a bigger challenge.  And then, as they say in Hollywood, fake it ‘til you make it.
  4. If you know you need assistance in an area, ask for that help as a condition for taking the job.  If you get in over your head later, ask for help fast.  People do not mind assisting open, proactive, genuine people who need a little coaching.  Just be humble and admit that you need some education in finance or engineering or whatever courses you slept through in college and then find yourself a mentor/coach to help you understand the basics.

And one last point:  don’t ever be “irreplaceable”.  You cannot be promoted out of your present job if you are in a key position and there is nobody to replace you!  The time to start training your replacement is yesterday!

What’s your ante?

by Himanshu Jhamb on March 1, 2010

If you have ever played poker (and I know there are many experts out there who can beat me hands-down belly-up!), you know what ante is. Simply put, it’s the wager you have to bet without an inkling of the hand that has been dealt to you or in other words It is the wager that you have to bet that simply qualifies you to ‘play’ in the game. Then there are many tables, each table with different stakes. You can choose which table you want to sit at and play on depending on how much money you have.

Business is very similar to poker. It requires us to wager something – an ante before we even have an inkling of the hand that is dealt to us. Think about the investment you have to make in order to bring a product to market or start your next entrepreneurial venture or even the new job that you get. In each of these situations there is this pesky ante that you cringe to put down but have to put down in order to play on the table! Here’s how the ante appears in each of these situations:

  1. Bringing a product to the market: You put your time, money (maybe not yours!) and energy as ante in building the product, doing your market research & getting help from others.
  2. Starting your entrepreneurial venture: Your ‘skin-in-the-game’ is pretty much your ante here.
  3. Getting a new job: You apply for your dream job, excel in that interview, land the job and within 2 months realize that what you’re doing is nothing like what you had imagined you’d be doing (Err.. I mean this in a negative way). In this case, all the effort that you put in to the point where you started the new job is your Ante.

My point so far: There is an ante in every game you play (Business being a game, too… )

Here’s the golden question: Is the table you are sitting at (which basically determines what ante you put) is the right table for what you want to achieve?

Consider this example: You are 45 years old & have plans of retiring with $4M in your bank account at the age of 65. You currently have $1M saved up. You make $100K a year. That’s a gap of $3M you have to cover in 20 years. You don’t need to be a math whiz to notice that it is impossible to get to this number with what you are making currently – You are basically sitting at the wrong table! because regardless of how well you play at this table, you’re never going to make your goal of $4M!

So you figured out that you’re sitting and playing at a table where no matter how well you play (heck! you might be the best player) you’re still not going to make it to your goal.

Now what?

Before you decide to take the leap of faith and move to the high-ante table, be aware that as you move up to the high-ante, the competition gets thick too. The players at the high-ante table are no pushovers. In fact, one mistake there and they’ll wipe you out before you know what hit you! So, yes – by all means, quit playing at the table where you are not going to make it BUT continue playing at the low-ante table until you are Skilled enough to move higher up and be the best player at the high-ante table!

… and of course, the last piece of advice and perhaps the most important to remember – Know when you have made it to your goal, get up from the table and go play a new game!

Good luck!

Do you have a rock star culture in your organization?

by Himanshu Jhamb on January 11, 2010

In a world where heroes are worshiped, superheroes idolized and rock stars treated as gods, somehow it gets lost upon us that the true power lies in high performance teams and not just embodied in one person, however good that person might be. Corporations are in the quest of seeking out individuals who are superstars – you can pick up any job requirement write-up and you’ll see a huge bent towards making sure the person sought after is an expert in at least 5 areas, a one-man-army and then, somewhere down there, in a tiny bullet point you will find a feeble mention that “Candidate must be a good team player”. Am I the only one who sees something amiss here?

Here’s a little story from my early career days:

I worked for a young organization where the team comprised of people who labeled themselves “Rock Stars” (seriously, they used to call themselves that). They were ambitious, competent, competitive, hungry, arrogant and loud. I still remember my first day as a trainee when one of them “Oriented” me on my responsibilities, the product, the customers and the services we provide… all in the space of 2 hours… and I was thrown in the deep waters to sink or swim. When I questioned this process, I was told – “Oh! Everyone has gone through this – after all, we only hire Rock Stars!” Only problem was – I didn’t feel much like a rock star when I was sitting in front of the customer the next day as an expert on the project. As time went by, I saw that my fellow Rock Stars were very talented and savvy but all of them kept “Winging” stuff because the philosophy of being a Rock Star begins with making tall promises (sometimes, unattainable) and then stretching to deliver. Sometimes things worked really well and they returned from projects as Heroes… though, most of the times, projects went awry and there was a lot of “coping” to do… but the label “Rock Stars” stuck to them. The one consequence that mostly all of them faced was they worked very long hours and over time, burned out.

So, what do you do when you see symptoms of a “Rock Star Culture” in your team. Here are a few things to consider:

  1. Ask many “How” Questions: This is the part that gets “Winged” most of the time. People make promises based on a “Feeling”. While I am not a total non-believer of this (because sometimes actions need to be committed to before planning – just talk to an entrepreneur, if you want a lively discussion on this one!) BUT many a times, the feeling falls under the area of  a story about things getting done without any thinking on how they will be done and who will do what.
  2. Estimate a little higher: Rock Stars know that in order to retain the mantle, they need to overachieve. Nothing wrong with that – except, sometimes they promise very aggressive estimates and overlook dependencies that are not easily visible at the start of the projects. The little bit of higher estimates gives them room to cope, when unforeseeable situations occur (and they do!).
  3. Make them commit to a Project Plan: A well laid out plan takes care of the concerns around “eating more than you can chew” because it forces you to ask fundamental questions like:
    • What tasks need to be done to achieve the final goal
    • Who will do it
    • What are the dependencies that must be taken care of to complete a task
    • How much effort is needed to complete a task
    • When will it get done
  4. Foster a Team environment: Reward people when they look out for each other, help each other and back each other – all aspects of good teamwork, encourage communication and coordination between team members, Acknowledge individual feats but amplify the team achievements more!

True, teams are made of individuals and the more skillful the individuals comprising the team, the better the capacity of the team… but teams are teams. What we are looking for is “High Performance Teams” and THAT comes not from gathering a bunch of superstars in a group BUT from Focused teams supporting each other at each step of the journey… Yes, by all means, have Rock Stars on your team but in the end what really matters is you need to have a Rocking TEAM!

It is YOUR Job to…

by Himanshu Jhamb on October 20, 2009

bad emailsIf you have worked long enough, chances are you must’ve heard this from someone – perhaps your boss, your boss’s boss OR (heavens help you!) your colleague. If it’s the latter, welcome to the “real” corporate world!

It would still be a bit bearable if you verbally “hear” such a thing from your colleagues… imagine receiving it in an email addressed to you and copied to other colleagues! That bakes… and takes the cake, in my view. Without further ado, here’s the event that inspired me to write this post, today.

A while back, when I was working for a client, I saw an email from a colleague of mine in another department addressed to another colleague (I was CC’d on this email) which read something like this.

“I don’t know why <some complaint>. Everything is always sent at the last second. Being the way it is, I should have gotten this <some expectation or demand>. I shouldn’t have to <do something>. It is your job to inform me of this. Going forward, I expect you to <some expectation>.”

I looked at this email and just smiled. After all, it was a classic.

Clearly, the sender was triggered to respond the way s/he responded by the request that was made of him/her earlier.

Clearly, the sender was in a “Crunch” situation and the request to him/her just nudged him/her over the edge… and

Clearly, it was totally Unclear to me what the real underlying issue the sender was facing to shoot back such an email.

Don’t get me wrong, the email was fantastic as it again reminded me of What not to write in emails!

Here are 6 (of my) “Insights” from this email:

  1. Be very careful of assertions you make with the usage of totalitarian words. Why? Because it’s really hard to prove. Take, for example, the usage of “Everything” and “Always” in the statement “Everything is always sent at the last second” implies literally everything the senders have sent to this person has been last second. If that were the case, I have every bit of empathy for the person’s situation. The problem is, I don’t think this assertion can be backed by enough proof to make it a fact.
  2. Be careful of using words like “Should” or “Should Not”. They usually imply a judgment or an assessment that someone has passed just in concert with their opinion alone.  They also imply a black and white view on a situation; which closes more possibilities than it opens up. For example, “I shouldn’t have to … “ is just the person’s opinion. Maybe there are situations where it makes sense to do what s/he is saying s/he shouldn’t have to.
  3. Try not to send “Feel Good” emails. This is a tricky one. It’s tricky because you have to assess how you will feel after you hit the “Send” button. If the answer is “Really good”, then give another thought to which part of you would feel really good. Your EGO or YOU. The difference is stark.
  4. Do not be “Trigger Happy”. OK, I understand you are frustrated. Fine. Type away your email as you please. You may even consider typing it ferociously so that your keyboard clacking can be heard in the next room. But, when you are done blowing off your steam; take a minute to proof read your email before hitting the “Send” button. Most likely, you’ll hit the “delete” button if you do re-read it even once! Remember… once sent, it’s sent and chances are it will be read pretty quickly.
  5. Telling someone what their job is in this manner is not only rude but also derogatory. Would you like to receive such an email from your colleague? If the answer is NO (I am betting on it!), why write this to someone else? Not only is it rude but it will only get you the opposite result of what you intended. Guaranteed. Besides, would you want to cooperate with this person once you read this email? Hell, no!
  6. Check your “TO” and “CC” list. If there is anyone on it except the person you are addressing this kind of an email to, you just made the matters worse! You not only made disparaging remarks to them directly, you did so PUBLICLY. Regardless of how convinced you may be that this is a good thing, it’s not. Because it does not give out a message of your authority (yeah! The one that you assume you have on others), the only message it gives out is how badly you need to go to email school.

FINALLY, if you really, absolutely and without fail have something to say to somebody that is on the lines of “It is your job to… “Please do yourself a favor – DON’T write an email! Instead, you might consider picking up the phone, calling the person directly and starting with “I really think we need to work on this together and here is how we can coordinate effectively… “.